New town, New life, Different Rules
by Fenrir1329
Summary: Morgana had no problem fitting in but when her life gets turned upside down how will she cope with the pressures of a new life under the care of her Uncle. Mergana with some Arwen too.
1. Chapter 1

Morgana had no problem fitting in but when her life gets turned upside down how will she cope with the pressures of a new life under the care of her Uncle. Mergana with some Arwen too.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin or any of the characters all rights go to the BBC and Shine productions I have simply created the story line.**

**Chapter 1 **

_'There are moments in your life that make you and sets the course of who you're going to be. Sometimes they're little, subtle moments. Sometimes, they're big moments you never saw coming. No one asks for their life to change, but it does. It's what you do afterwards that counts. That's when you find out who you are.'_

Morgana didn't ask for this. She didn't ask for a new life. A new home. A new family. A new school with new people she didn't know. She didn't ask for her family, her true family, to be taken from her. For her father to die and her mother in a mental home suffering from the loss of her only love. Her life had completely changed. She should have never let them get in that car. She should have come up with an excuse, a way of distracting them. But no, she didn't do that, they got in the car and the rest is what people call history.

Standing in front of the cold gates leading to Uther's detached town house she couldn't help but shiver. She had never liked her uncle, thought he was a tyrant hungry for power, to an extent her opinions of him are true. After all everyone is pretty ruthless in business, but there was something about him she didn't like. True he loved her ever since she was a baby, but was that enough. No he couldn't replace Gorlois even if he tried and he knew it. As for his son, well he is just a prat plain and simple. Arrogant at the best of times, which Morgana didn't like. The way he would boss people around made her sick and she would be dammed if he ever tried that on her, she knew exactly where to tell him to go. She knew others felt differently. In fact ever since they were little she became aware of the ways he would swoon and tease girls. This was only the beginning for as they got older it got worse.

Morgana felt sick as she pushed these thoughts out her head and opened the rusty gates and sauntered towards the large oak doors. Her large, black suitcase wheeled behind her and she took an inward breathe and knocked firmly on the door.

"Morgana child, come on in, don't be shy," Uther had opened the door, looking rather pompous in one of his 'business suits' beaming at her she couldn't help but return the gesture. "Arthur get over here and take Morganas' suitcase."

Arthur reluctantly walked over took her suitcase from her right hand and gave a half-hearted smile. Arthur and Morgana had what people described as a complicated relationship. One day they would be nice to each other and the next you would see them attempting to rip each other's throats out. However they hadn't seen each other for a long time. Morgana's family had moved to Ireland for her father's work. Only Morgana was the one to return back to London five years later.

"I'm very grateful Uther." Morgana genuinely said to the middle aged man who had now taken a seat on the luxurious brown leather sofa and had a glass of whisky in his hand.

"Nonsense child, your family." Well that wasn't strictly true. Uther wasn't actually her uncle but for as long as she could remember she had always called him so. "Besides your father would have done the same for Arthur if the situations were reversed."

At the mention of her father Morgana flinched. The pain was all too raw and the images related to that terrible day all too vivid. The doctors told her it would get better with time but she didn't believe them. If her nightmares were anything to go by she will have a long way to go until she is fully whole again.

"Come on Morgana I'll show you your room." Arthur tried to be as polite as anyone of his arrogance could be as he hauled her suitcase up the grand stair case.

She followed him down the lengthy corridor taking in all the fine art that hung on the freshly decorated walls beside her. The art was truly breath-taking, all ornate and a thing of beauty.

"Are you gonna stare at the walls all day or are you gonna come in here and see your room?" Arthur asked impatiently as he held the door open for her to enter.

"Sorry I was just," her sentence was cut half way through as her mouth formed a O shape at her room.

It was definitely bigger than the one back in Ireland. Her eyes scanned over the desk she assumed she would use for completing homework and revising. It had freshly sharpened pencils and different coloured pens, a reading lamp fixed on the edge and a brand new 'Dell' laptop. Her bed was in the middle of the room and covered in fine silk and expensive linens fit for a lady. _Big enough to fit three people in._ She thought to herself as she examined the sheer scale of her new bed.

"So dinners at eight. Get used to your new room, erm, unpack and I guess I'll see you in a bit." Arthur said before leaving her in her new room.

"I guess this is my new life." Morgana thought out loud and let a heavy sigh leave her mouth.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

_"We're so quick to cut away pieces of ourselves to suit a particular relationship, a job, a circle of friends, incessantly editing who we are until we fit in."_

'**_Albion Academy_**_'_the sign read as Morgana followed Arthur as they made their way into what is her new school. As soon as they entered the gates Arthur had disappeared with a group of his equally arrogant and snobby friends, leaving Morgana to find her own way around. She didn't mind though, he usually ignored her and she was confident she could find out easily enough where everything was.

Morgana had no problem fitting in. She had no problem making friends and starting fresh, but this time seemed different. And no it wasn't just the uniform, it was the way people were separated. She knew instantly where people stood. It's never that hard to figure it out. The popular boys are arrogant pricks, like Arthur, and the girls' well they are either sluts or slags. (I'll let you choose). Then of course you have a mixture of nerds, normals, freaks, crack heads and other stereotypical groups. Morgana hated stereotypes. For one thing no one can be stereotyped, each person is different and for another everyone assumed that she must be a complete bitch because she was pretty.

She knew she was pretty and sometimes she had no problem admitting that, it had helped her get out of some sticky situations in the past, but sometimes it really pissed her off. How boys would look at her as if she was piece of meat. So sometimes she wanted to be invisible and escape intruding eyes.

Deciding that she had to find someone to talk to, to help her find her way around the new school she spotted a friendly looking girl with a few friends. The girl had skin the colour of melted toffee and eyes so warming and brown it was like a cup of hot chocolate on a cold winter's night. Her tightly curled hair fell just over the collar of the light blue blazer which covered the white shirt underneath. She wore the schools black skirt with thick black tights and cute little ballet pumps on her feet.

"Sorry, erm, Hi I'm Morgana Le Fey, I'm new here I was just wondering if you could show me the way to room 4." Morgana said stopping in front of the girl and her friends.

The girl smiled pleasantly at Morgana before replying, "Hi Morgana, my name is Guinevere but everyone calls me Gwen. Sure no problem I actually have to go to room 4 as well."

Morgana smiled at how kind Gwen was towards her, after all they had only just met and she wasn't used to such kindness.

"So you're new here huh?" Gwen said as they entered the main building and strode through the crowd of students towards room 4. Morgana knew it wasn't a question but really a fact so simply nodded and waited for her to continue.

"What was your old school like?" she continued.

"It's not as big as this and definitely not as posh." Morgana replied worried she might have offended her with the 'not as posh' part, but Gwen simply smiled.

"And I'm also guessing that from your accent you're not from here?" Gwen had picked up on Morgana's Irish tone.

"No I'm not. I mean I was but me and my family moved five years ago." She didn't want to go into more details and didn't want to rehash bad memories. Gwen seemed to catch on and nodded.

Gwen stopped before a door reading '_History_'and led Morgana inside just as the school bell rang to signal the start of first period.

The room was quite full already. Morgana quickly noticed the 'popular girls' because as she had thought earlier they looked like sluts or slags. Their school skirt barley covered their bottom's and they had made a point of revealing their chests by opening the first three buttons of their shirts, which were extremely too tight and Morgana even thought it could be painful. Gwen led Morgana over to a desk in the middle row which was for two people. They sat with Gwen on the left and Morgana on the right. Morgana had insistently chosen the seat to the right as it was slightly closer to the door, just in case she decided to leave early.

The room started filling more until there were only two seats left. Morgana hadn't noticed Arthur come in and assumed he either didn't have the same lesson as her or decided to skip, she rested on the latter.

"Gwen what time does this lesson finish?" Morgana asked as Gwen was pulling out her history book and a note pad to write on.

"10 and then next lesson starts at five past. Break is at 11 and then you have your next two periods and then lunch at 1 and then you last two periods until 3:45. Oh that reminds me, Do you want to sit with me and my friends at lunch? Erm, not that you have to or anyt," Morgana cut her off to stop Gwen from rambling on.

"I'd love to sit with you." She reassured the sweet girl and gave her a gentle smile before opening her bag and getting out a bottle of water and popping two pills of her prescribed medication. The medication was to help her with the thumping headaches she got every day from the lack of sleep at the night. They were supposed to help but they didn't however Morgana took them anyway hoping they would ease the pain of her heart if not anything else.

The door to the classroom opened and Morgana and Gwen both turned their heads in the direction of the noise. Morgana expected to see the teacher, after all it was ten minutes into the lesson and whoever it was hadn't decided to show up which had led to the class becoming loud which didn't help her headache. What Morgana didn't expect to see was a tall and slightly lanky boy with raven coloured hair and deep blue eyes walk in and take a the seat that was empty next to her and Gwen's. He sat on the chair that was closet Morgana, which for some reason made her heart beat a little faster. She glanced over to the mysterious boy and studied him while he was taking out his stationary for the lesson.

His skin was almost a complete match of her own. The colour of ivory which contrasted beautifully with his raven dark hair. His hands were long and slender but still very masculine at the same time and his eyes were so transfixing she wanted to loose herself in the deep blue ocean of them. She kept her gaze skimming over his face noticing his high cheekbones and large, but cute ears, until her eyes fell on his lips. Lips that looked so delicious she wanted to taste him right then, so soft and perfectly shaped she couldn't stop looking at him. Suddenly she felt hot and began to pull at the colour of her shirt to try and bring in cool air. What was wrong with her? She had never felt like this. Never so caught up on someone and never wanting to take your eyes off them. But she had to. She couldn't let herself get like this, whatever this is. So she quickly averted her gaze and started at the front. Gwen started giggling next to her and Morgana turned to face her with a confused expression on her face.

"Oh please Morgana, you know exactly why I'm laughing." She said a little too proud for Morgana likes. She gave Gwen and stern look.

"I have no idea what you mean Gwen." Trying to sound completely confused, but knowing that she totally failed and it came off all wrong. She was convincing no one. Gwen just continued to giggle until Morgana got even more embarrassed.

She didn't know why she felt the way she did. The boy, whoever he was, wasn't exactly handsome and if she was quite honest he was a bit awkward and geeky but there was something about him that made him desirable and she needed to know what it was.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Before I start this chapter I wanted to let you all know that in this chapter I'm writing from Merlin's perspective and then the next will be back in Morgana's. xxx

_"There are two kinds of sparks, the one that goes off with a hitch like a match, but it burns quickly. The other is the kind that needs time, but when the flame strikes... it's eternal, don't forget that."_

He had noticed her as soon as he took his first step into the room. It wasn't just her breath taking beauty that made him notice, nor the way she sat facing him. It was the way her eyes looked into his. Her stunning jade eyes connecting with his blue as if she could see right through him and into his soul. He didn't dare move until he was sure she wasn't a figment of his imagination, a day dream he mistook to be real, but after several long moments he began to move towards his usual seat. It just so happened that his seat was near to her and the knowledge of being closer to her made him slightly giddy.

"Calm down Merlin," he murmured to himself. "She probably only looked at you because you came in late. Now just walk towards your seat and calm down."

His hands began to sweat a little so he whipped them on the front of his black, school trousers. Her eyes never left him which only made him feel even more uncomfortable. _Why does she keep looking at me?_ He thought to himself. He knew he wasn't attractive or cute even, he was awkward and geeky and she was, she was so beautiful. _Stop it Merlin she doesn't even like you she is just curious._ He thought again. But he was curious too. He hadn't seen her before, not in school or outside school. Who was she? Why is she here? All these questions came into Merlin's mind and he suddenly wanted to know everything about her.

He reached his seat and sat down, avoiding her gaze deliberately until he was calm. Merlin felt her eyes still on him, her stunning emerald eyes scanning him, and he wanted to do the same to her. He didn't look at her while he was walking, the only things he noticed were her eyes and her long and slightly wavy, raven coloured hair. Gwen giggling stopped him from day dreaming further and made him realise to get out his stationary for the lesson. Moving towards his bag he risked a glance in her direction. She was facing Gwen and looked a little flushed, while Gwen continued to giggle which only made her cheeks pinker. Why was she blushing? It couldn't be because of him. No, that would be stupid. Gwen must have said something to her. Yes Gwen said something girly and that made her blush. She turned to face the front rather quickly and Merlin placed his stationary on his desk and did the same. He so wanted to look at her, but he didn't want her to think he was a creep or something so sat still.

"Merlin, I want to introduce you to Morgana Le Fey she is new." Gwen said with a slight giggle in her voice and both Merlin and Morgana faced her.

"Oh hi, I, I'm Merlin" he stammered as she turned and he saw just how beautiful she actually was. Her skin was like the colour of ivory which contrasted with the harshness of her raven hair that fell just below her chest. Her face was like it had been sculpted by angels and her lips, oh, how he longed for her lips. The colour of blood red resting on the sumptuous skin. His hands began to sweat again and he had to calm himself down. He gulped and took in a little air, hoping she didn't notice.

"Hi like Gwen said my name is Morgana." She said sweetly and smiled at him and he returned her smile.

Her accent was different from his and he tried to pin point it. Irish. She was Irish.

"Are you from Ireland?" Merlin asked Morgana wanting to learn as much about her as he could.

"Erm, yes and no," she paused before continuing, "I'm from here but me and my family moved to Ireland five years ago. My dad, he got a job there so we moved."

She was utterly captivating. He wanted to keep talking to her, keep looking at her and he probably would have if Arthur hadn't stormed in and sat abruptly next to him, moaning about something. Arthur was quickly followed by Mr Gaius their history teacher who was generally ten minutes late.

"Ok today class we will start the topic of Medieval times," Mr Gaius continued to ramble on and on and Merlin saw Morgana listening inventively to his words scribbling down as much information as she could. He smiled to himself.

"Ouch, what was that for?" Arthur prodded Merlin in his side to get his attention. He was wearing a smug grin.

"You've met Morgana then?" he asked.

"Yes just now she seems nice. Have you met her?" Merlin responded. He wanted to say something other than nice, something like stunning or beautiful but somehow all he could manage was nice.

"Oh yeah I've met her Merlin." He said rather sarcastically.

"Why did you say it like that for?" the boy quizzed.

"Because Merlin, if you remember the conversation we had yesterday, I told you that someone would be living with me and Uther and well that someone is Morgana." Arthur said to Merlin before he continued "Listen, we used to be really close, almost like brother and sister, until she moved to Ireland with her family because her dad got a job over there. Anyway there was a car crash and her dad died she and her mom were injured but it wasn't serious. Her mom is in a mental home 'cause she's gone all wacko and Morgana was left alone so my dad has taken her in."

Merlin was in shock. She must be so sad and broken and Merlin wanted to fix her, like a broken doll that needed to be repaired. How hard must that have been, losing her dad only to lose her mom as well. Merlin knew what it was like to grow up without a dad but at least he had his mom, she had no one.

"That's just horrid." Merlin stammered back.

"I know. Gorlois, her dad, was really good friends with mine. He died two months after they arrived in Ireland. But her mom didn't completely go insane until a year after that. Morgana cared for her until she couldn't cope anymore and now she is here with us." Arthur filled in the missing details for Merlin and stole a quick glance in Morgana's direction. She smiled at him and then carried on with her work.

Merlin loved the way she smiled. How it light up her whole face and made the slight sadness in her eyes go away if only for a brief second. Merlin knew right there and then that he had fallen under that spell. The spell that would complicate everything.

He had fallen in love.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

**Thank you for the reviews it really makes me happy to know people like my story. **Ok as promised back to Morgana's perspective, and some Merlin too. What will happen between her and Merlin? xxx

_"Don't walk behind me; I may not lead. Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend."_

The day seemed to drag after the history lesson. Next was physical education which Morgana hated, because why would someone need to run around a stupid field three times in a row and then do twenty star jumps. They wouldn't. The next two lessons didn't go so well either. Let's just say trying to speak French with an Irish accent doesn't mix well. But Morgana was happy now, siting with Gwen on a red table in the cafeteria eating her freshly bought pasta, which actually wasn't that bad.

"Morgana?" Gwen asked as she took a sip of sparkling water out of the bottle next to her. Morgana raised her head, a sign to show she was listening and Gwen continued. "I was wondering if anyone caught you're eye?"

Morgana looked at her confusion spread across her face. _What does she mean caught my eye?_ She thought. Her eyebrows sunk while she tried to decipher what exactly Gwen was insinuating. It was like a light went off in her head as she finally understood and Morgana felt herself blush under Gwen's gaze.

"I'll take that a yes then." Gwen said smirking at her new friend. She had only known Morgana for half a day but already she knew she had a friend for life.

Morgana could feel her temperature rising. Just the thought of the awkwardly adorable Merlin sent shivers down her spine and heat to her skin. She didn't understand why she felt so, so enthralled by him, after all she had only met him this morning and only talked to him for about two minutes, but somehow that was enough.

"Twelve o'clock." Gwen said which broke Morgana out of thought. Twelve o'clock? Gwen wanted her to look up and straight ahead. Why? Morgana did so anyway and knew exactly why Gwen had made her look. It was him. It was Merlin. Just the sight of him made her tingle, her mind race, her breath stop. He was with Arthur, and they were walking straight towards them.

Panic. That's what was coursing through her veins, panic. It was written all over her face.

"Breathe Morgana." Gwen said seriously worried for new friend. She hadn't let a single bit of air in her lungs since she looked up and at this rate Gwen was scared she might faint. Morgana finally took some air and looked straight down at her pasta.

"Why are they walking over to us?" Morgana asked Gwen in a worried and nervous tone. The tingling feeling wouldn't go away. Normally when this happened she was so cool and collected, she would easily brush of the boy who would come her way but not him. She felt something for him, something she had never felt before.

"Oh Arthur didn't tell you? That's strange he said he would-"Morgana cut her off.

"Tell me what?" she looked up from her pasta to see Arthur and Merlin standing right next to them.

Now she was nervous. He mouth had gone dry all of a sudden and she quickly tried to act calm as she reached for her water and took a big gulp. The dryness wasn't going away and it didn't help that Merlin sat opposite her while Arthur sat opposite Gwen. Arthur took Gwen's hand immediately and laced his fingers with hers. _Oh_ was what Morgana thought. There was no need for words now Arthur had just silently told her what she needed to know. Arthur and Gwen were a couple. Together.

"Maybe he isn't so arrogant." Morgana whispered to herself watching as Arthur and Gwen smiled and talked.

"Oh, no he is, don't let that façade fool you. He's arrogant and a prat oh and did I mention dollop head?" Merlin had heard her whisper. She giggled at Arthur's hurt expression which quickly changed to being charmed by Gwen.

There it was again. Her smile. He loved the way it warmed her eyes, the glint it gave them which made the green shine extra bright like a freshly polished jewel. The curve of her mouth made him want to kiss her so much. She pushed her hair back with her right hand so she could see more of him. What he wouldn't give to run his hand through her hair. _Stop it Merlin you have only met this girl for five minutes_ and gave himself a mental kick, but someone he felt as if he had known her his whole life and he wondered to himself if she felt the same.

"I can imagine. I remember him when we were children, it would seem he hasn't grown up since then." She retorted with a smirk and Merlin felt giddy again. Everything she did made him giddy.

"So how's your day going?" he asked her before opening his sandwich box and taking a bite out of his fresh cheese sandwich.

"It's been ok. I loved history class but the others not so much. Miss Morgause is an utter b-"

"Yep she is. French isn't that great." Merlin cut her off, not because he didn't want her to speak, on the contrary he never wanted her to stop speaking, especially to him, he just didn't want to imagine her saying unkind words. To him she didn't seem like an unkind person.

"Ok Miss Morgause isn't that great, but French is, the language I mean, not so much the class. Isn't it supposed to be the language of love or something? Well the language of love is hard to say when your accent keeps tripping you up." He smirked at her last comment. He can see her trying to say the words but it coming out something completely different. He began to chuckle.

"Are you laughing at me?" she teased which only made him laugh more and her also. _She is flirting with me! She is actually flirting with me!_ Merlin was silently shouting in his head. It's a good job she couldn't read minds or he would be toast.

The conversation never seemed to stop after there. It flowed like a gentle river in a forest. Arthur and Gwen would talk for a bit leaving Merlin and Morgana to talk, only to occasionally drop a comment here and there. It was perfect.

Wasn't it?


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

**Again thank you all for the reviews. I will try and update as regularly as I can but I have a huge History exam coming up so don't be mad if it isn't updated in a while. Hope you're enjoying the story. **So I left it on a cliff-hanger sorry about that. ;D please let me know what you think. I had a lot of writers block in this chapter. I'm really sorry it's a bit crappy and extremely short. xxx

_"Grief is like the ocean: it's deep and dark and bigger than all of us. And pain is like a thief in the night. Quiet. Persistent. Unfair."_

Morgana woke from her restless sleep. It had been two weeks since she had moved here and every night she would have the same dream. Not a dream really but memories. Bad memories hurtful ones, about her dad and how angry she was at her mom for disappearing like he did. The medication the doctors had given her didn't help, it just sustained her in dreams for longer instead of getting rid of them. She felt trapped like there was no way out this hole she was in and defiantly no light at the end of the tunnel. It was nearly time to get ready for school anyway so she slinked out of bed and went into her en suite bathroom. She ran the tap and splashed the spilling cold water over her face, washing away the perspiration but all she wanted really was to wash away the pain. The images came tumbling into her head again, like one big hurricane. Her dad lying outside the car covered in blood. Her mom's grief stricken screams, and then silence. A simple hollowed silence. That silence is what scared her the most.

"Morning Morgana sleep well?" Uther asked as she sulked towards the dining table. Uther had a habit of them all eating breakfast together. She had hidden the dark circles under her eyes well, plastering a lot of concealer on to make her look somewhat normal.

"I suppose, if you call screaming yourself awake well." She retorted spitefully. Uther didn't mind he just thought it was because of the stress and grief, and yes to an extent he was right. She thought him false and a tyrant and he hadn't proved her wrong since her arrival two weeks ago.

They ate breakfast in silence after that.

"Are you excited?" Arthur teased as they walked into the school grounds.

"And why should I be excited?" responding a question with a question was Morgana's style. Arthur and her had become close again and they were more like brother and sister than ever before.

"Oh Morgana don't try and play dumb with me. We both know that you and Merlin have been sneaking off at night on secret dates that you wanted to keep well, I guess, secret." She was dumbfounded to say the least.

How had he figured out? Had Merlin told him? No he couldn't have he promised her he wouldn't and she knew he wouldn't break a promise, not to her.

"How do you know that?" she replied halting him by grabbing his and preventing him from trying to worm his way out of this sticky situation.

"Ok don't freak out," he said and waited for her nod to continue. "I followed you last night."

"You what?!" she practically screamed, before gaining her composure. "You what?" she whispered this time.

"I had heard noises some nights before and when I heard them again last night I wanted to check them out. So, I saw you scurrying down the staircase and leaving. I went to the window and then watched as you and Merlin walked off. And may I say you didn't come home at a very respectable time young lady." He mocked the last bit trying to do his best Uther impression.

"You won't say anything to anyone will you? I don't mind if you tell Gwen just not Uther." She shivered at the thought of Uther finding out. Only he knows what he would do.

"As if I'd tell Uther." Arthur reassured as they walked into the main building.

Yes it had only been a day when Merlin asked Morgana out. And maybe they were moving a little too fast, well maybe not too fast I mean they hadn't even shared their first kiss. They didn't have a song or anything like that. Nothing in their relationship could compare with Arthur and Gwen's, they were truly a match made in heaven, but they had each other and that was enough, for now. But when will the time come when it wasn't enough. This was the thought that kept eating away at the back of Morgana's mind as they found Gwen and Merlin and walked towards maths together.

Trying to act casual Merlin strode next to her matching her pace. She was tempted to lace her fingers in is and just declare that they were in fact an item but couldn't bring herself to do it.

"You ok? You seem a little distant." Merlin quizzed as he checked her face.

"I'm fine. Just a bad night's sleep that's all." Still he was unsatisfied with the answer, "I promise Merlin that's all." That seemed to satisfy him.

In truth her bad night's sleep wasn't the real reason. She had gotten used to her erratic sleeping patterns, it was the nagging thought in the back of her mind saying it would never be enough, he would never be enough. She was broken, damaged goods with too much pain in her heart to be filled with love. It was her destiny to be alone and she knew that ever since her father died. Even with a group of friends she is alone. Even with Merlin she is alone. That was the scary thought.

That was the silence.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

**I hope you all are enjoying the story so far. I read it too myself and laughed at how depressing Morgana was in the last chapter, so maybe she needs someone to cheer her up. :D**

_"It's so hard to forget pain, but it's even harder to remember sweetness. We have no scar to show for happiness. We learn so little from peace."_

Staring at the clock watching the second hand tick around in a rhythmic motion. Tick, tock, tick ,tock he heard in the dead silence that filled the classroom he was. He was supposed to be doing a maths test but all he could think about was Morgana. How distant she was with him this morning. It had only been two weeks of them knowing each other but every day he watched he become more and more distant. Like she wasn't connected. Like her body was here but he presence was somewhere else. He didn't like seeing her like this. Her smiles were never as true as they had been the first day they had met. She still smiled at him on their dates together, actually she smiled at him every time they eyes met, but it seemed forced. _It's her grief, her way of dealing with things_ he thought, as he glanced around the room watching as people scribbled down answers where as he had only managed his name before his mind had wondered. _I wish I could help her, take away the pain and sadness in her eyes. Make her laugh and watch her delicious lips curve into a smile so wide and laugh so heart-warming it was infectious. But how? She won't even tell me what's wrong. I need to get her alone to talk. Explain that she doesn't have to go through it alone she has me. But how could she not know that already? _His mind filling with all these thoughts, all these ways he would talk to her and comfort her. He wanted to comfort her so badly.

Suddenly he grabbed his mobile from his blazer pocket and sifted through his contacts until his finger found her name. Even the sights of her name on his screen made him giddy and ache all at the same time. Clicking on her number he texted her.

_Hey, listen I think we should meet up and talk. I know it sounds weird but I'll explain later. _

_Meet me at the park at 7 tonight._

_Love you _

He quickly put his phone back in his pocket before eventually starting the test.

* * *

The vibration of her phone made her jump in the plastic, brown seat she was sitting in. Miss Morgause was standing facing the board scribbling down the sentence 'Je tiens à vous rencontrer.', (which in English means 'I would like to meet you.'), in her signature small hand writing that Morgana had to squint to see. Gwen was in the seat next to her, her head rested on her hands as she tried not to drift off into sleep at the sound of the French language coming out of Miss Morgauses' mouth.

Morgana placed her hand in her blazer pocket and discreetly removed her IPhone and placed it under the desk so Morgause wouldn't see. Merlin's name popped up on her screen with three x's next to it letting her know that the text was from him. She smiled to herself as she unlocked her phone and opened up the text message.

_Hey, listen I think we should meet up and talk. I know it sounds weird but I'll explain later. _

_Meet me at the park at 7 tonight._

_Love you _

She frowned before locking her phone and placing it back in its original place. _This doesn't sound good, _was her first thought. _What if he is breaking up with me? I mean there's no reason why he shouldn't, I've been flaky and distant and haven't let him know how I feel about him, about us, or about anything. _

"What's wrong?" Gwen asked in a hushed whisper careful not to get Morgause's attention.

"It's Merlin. I think he is going to break up with me." Morgana whispered back. The thought of Merlin ending their relationship was heart-breaking. He was the only good thing that had happened to her since her father's death, and the thought of being alone again trapped in the silence made her sick.

"I'm sure he won't. Honestly Morgana, don't worry. He wouldn't do that to you, I promise." Gwen said reassuringly. _How could she know? _Morgana thought.

"I know what you're thinking, 'How could she know', am I right? Well Morgana I'll tell you how I know. The way he looks at you is the same way Arthur used to look at me, and the way you look at him is well you know what it is. Merlin loves you and you know it ok. So stop worrying." With that comment from Gwen, Morgana felt better and began to listen to the sharpness in Miss Morgause's tone as she participated in the lesson.

* * *

It was 7:10 and Morgana wasn't here. Merlin sighed as he drew his eyes from his watch, which he had been checking every five seconds since it had turned 7:00. _She wasn't coming_ he thought as he stared at the tree in front of him, watching as the dark green leaves swayed in the gentile even breeze. It wasn't a particularly dark evening. The sun had set and an overcast of slightly tinged pink clouds filled the sky, only letting dim light through there surface. It wasn't cold either. Being the beginning of October usually you would feel cold but not this evening, all there was, was a slight chill as the breeze skimmed his exposed arms. Merlin hadn't bothered with a jacket, instead a lose fitting top and jeans which he wore nearly all the time outside of school and his black converse.

7:11 appeared in green lines on his watch and again he sighed.

"She's not coming." He exhaled as he moved off the bench and stood slowly. Just as he was about to walk away he saw her coming over, walking through the maze of tree's and toward the bench by which he now stood next too.

She looked beautifully understated. Her hair tied back in a loose bun leaving all her features exposed. She too wore a lose fitting top, but on her legs were black skinny jeans. His eyes skimmed over every inch of her, from her piercing jade eyes to her covered feet.

"Hey," he said to her as she reached his side, "I thought you weren't coming."

She smiled taking his hand and lowering herself and Merlin onto the bench. "Of course I was coming. You asked me too didn't you?"

The smile she gave him didn't quite reach her eyes. There was no glint in them, just hollow colours mixed together. He smiled back though before he explained why they needed to meet.

"Morgana, don't think that I wanted to meet you to break up or something because that isn't true I er I-" he stammered with nerves before continuing. "I just wanted to make sure you're ok. You haven't been yourself lately. Distant. You know what I mean?"

She nodded. She knew exactly what he meant. Could he see it. Was she really that easy to read, like a private diary sprawled open for all too see. The thought scared her and he could see her expression change from curious to vulnerable. He didn't like seeing her like this. Usually she was so strong and confident but now she was like a baby that wanted to be held.

"I, I can't cope Merlin. Five years and you'd think it would get better, that pain and grief would settle down and I'd be able to be normal, but they don't. They keep eating and eating away at me until I scream or cry. But the problem is I can't do that. I can't scream. I can't cry. I just feel numb. You know? Like you could stab me and I wouldn't feel it. You know Merlin, I used to think good things happened to good people, that the universe rewarded us for every good dead we had done, for every life we have saved, but if that is so then my dad must have been a bad person. He must have done awful things to deserve to die," he could hear the anger rising in her voice the mixed feelings of pain, grief and anger all fused into one but as soon as he heard that it changed. It became weak again. "What if my dad wasn't a bad person, what if I am? What if I'm the reason he's dead? The reason that everything, every person I get close to disappears. Maybe this is a karmic pay back, the universes way of telling me I suck. That I will never have a family and never be close to someone. Never be loved." She sobbed as all of her emotions came spilling out of her like running water from a tap.

He felt his heart break as each tear ran down her cheeks. As every breath she took sounded heavier than the last. She wasn't a bad person. None of this was her fault. The universe wasn't giving her a karmic pay back. She was perfect in every single way and he needed to let her know.

"I love you." He said slowly caressing her face with his right hand while tilting her head up to face him with the other. "None of this is your fault. You're not a bad person you have so much good in you. You're perfect."

He lent into her face feeling her breath mingling with his. Warm and sweet. Then their lips met.

They had just shared their first kiss.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7 **

**So Merlin and Morgana finally had their first kiss, awww. If anyone has any suggestions or wants to see more of something then let me know. ;) hope you will enjoy what's to come. I will try and update as quickly as I can but on Friday I have a huge history exam so I'm revising for that. (wish me luck) **

_"Sadness flies on the wings of the morning and out of the heart of darkness comes the light."_

He had kissed her. She hadn't seen it coming, after all she was sobbing like an idiot engulfed in her own misery to even look at him. It was shock but a good one, like a bolt of electricity or a match igniting a flame. As his lips touched hers, her heat skipped a beat. For a while all she could do was be still. Captured by him, by his touch, his taste. He tasted so good, like something from a dream. She wanted to taste him more. Kissing him back more passionately.

She smiled as she lay in bed that night not wanting to sleep, not wanting to erase what they had shared only a few hours ago. Remembering how his hands slide down her back resting on the curve of her hip. How she had reacted almost immediately by bringing her hands to the back of his head pushing him closer. Tempting him to go further. To kiss her more. He had for a while before they both needed to stop and get air. After that they had talked, about him and his family and her how she was feeling. It was nice to know that someone cared. Not just putting up with her because they had to but because they wanted to. And for those few hours with Merlin the silence had gone and her pain disappeared like the wind.

Of course she had phoned Gwen the minute she had gotten back and locked herself in her bedroom to stop people, Uther, intruding. Gwen was ecstatic for her new friend and her old one saying, 'They both deserved to be happy' and how she was 'glad they had found each other'. So was Morgana. She was glad that she had found someone who was not only one of her best friends but her love as well. The way he cared for her was so special, so sweet she never wanted to be without him. With him she couldn't breathe but when they were apart all she wanted was to be with Merlin. She hoped Merlin felt the same way.

Drifting into what promised to be a peaceful sleep she replayed the night's events and smiled, until she was gone.

The darkness had taken her.

* * *

School was always a drag, a never torture that stops at the last ring of the school bell. People say that school is the best time of your life and maybe those people are right. After all that's where she had met Merlin. Oh even the thought of him made her smile with excitement. Him standing next to her in the school uniform but looking so adorable.

She was walking towards the gates with Arthur. They decided not to be driven to school today, well she hadn't but Arthur insisted that a bit of physical exercise wouldn't hurt.

"How was your date?" Arthur broke the silence.

"Oh Gwen told you then. God I thought that girl could keep a secret." Morgana got slightly worried that if Gwen had told him about the date then she might have told him what had happened.

"Morgana, she tells me everything." He said triumphantly. Bending down to her ear he whispered, "Everything." Oh no she had told him. Gwen had told him that they had kissed. Her and Merlin had kissed. Her cheeks began to redden under the protruding eye of Arthur.

"So he kissed you huh? Well good for him. Er, no, erm good for you." He smiled correcting himself, "Did you like it? Did you get butterflies?" he teased her a sign that he had accepted their relationship.

She sighed, "Not that's it's any of YOUR business, but yes I did like it and yes I did get butterflies." She laughed when she saw Arthur cringe at her words, and jabbed him in his side.

"Oh look Morgana, theirs your knight in shining armour ." pointing at Merlin who was waiting for her outside the main building. "Hmmm if you ask me he looks more like a servant, a simple servant." Teasing her again.

"Arthur, not jealous are you?" she said mocking him.

"Of Merlin? You're kidding right? I could never be jealous of him."

"And why is that?"

"It's obvious of course. He has to put up with you." Meaning the comment as joke but seeing the hurt and pain in her eyes made him mental kick himself. How could he be so stupid. "Morgana, I didn't m-"

"I know." Not wanting to make him feel bad. It was a joke and she might have laughed if it didn't hit a sensitive spot.

Well, she might of.

* * *

**Erggg sorry its a short one. What's wrong with me? Well I wanted to show you vunerable Morgana again. If you think that I have missed something or you want me to write something in more detail just ask. ;) ok keep reading and I'll update soon. xxx**


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

**I just want to say a huge thank you to everyone who is sticking with me and actually likes this story. So I had a request for some more Arwen bits so guess what, this is a whole chapter of pure Arwen. Now if you don't want to read it you can just skip, but I'd like you to read it ;D. Oh and before I let you read this chapter I have fallen in love. Erm not with someone with a song. It makes me think of Mergana, Switchfoot -Your Love is a song. Check it out. Anyway on with the chapter. Xxx**

_"She didn't need to understand the meaning of life; it was enough to find someone who did, and then fall asleep in his arms and sleep as a child sleeps, knowing that someone stronger than you is protecting you from all evil and all danger"_

"Arthur. I told you didn't I?" Gwen asked at the blonde haired boy siting next her, not moving her eyes off the computer screen she was working on.

"Told me what?" stealing Morgana's style by answering a question with a question.

"About Morgana and Merlin." saying it so casually the two could have been going out for months.

"Oh that. Yeah you said a little about it. I think these were you exact words." He coughed clearing his throat before turning on his best Gwen voice, "They kissed Arthur. Ahhh they kissed! Merlin and Morgana kissed. Then you laughed down the phone before hanging up."

She giggled as he had remembered all of their conversation, but the impression, she thought, didn't sound anything like her. "Well Arthur Pendragon I am impressed. But there is something I haven't told you." Her expression quickly changed from humorous to worried.

"What is Gwen?" He turned to face her as she did him. She opened her mouth to speak what was on her mind before quickly closing it and carrying on with her work. "Hey, you can tell me anything, you know that." Touching her cheek gently. Her face warmed at his touch.

"Ok. But you have to keep it a secret. Promise me." He looked away from her pondering the comment for a second before nodding his head. "Arthur she mustn't know. She mustn't find out."

"Who mustn't?"

"It's not cheating. Well he told me it's not. It's probably nothing. We should get on with our work." No answering his question. This was a bad sign. Gwen never lied to him, she loved him so what was so important or who was so important that she couldn't tell him.

"Gwen please. What's going on? Who mustn't find out?"

"Morgana." She answered in a hushed tone, like it was a sin to say her name.

"Morgana? Gwen what the hell is going on?" he asked even more confused than ever.

"Merlin he erm, he has been texting someone. Someone we know, or rather someone we knew."

Arthur's expression turned to anger. If Merlin was cheating on Morgana he would surely knock the bloody block out. How dare he! After all she has been through. Quickly assessing the anger in his face Gwen continued.

"No Arthur, don't jump to conclusions it isn't what you think. He's been texting Freya. She's back."

"Why the hell is she back?" he spat.

"I don't know and neither does Merlin that's why he has been texting her. He doesn't want to see or hear from her, but she contacted him saying she was back in town and is coming back to school on Wednesday."

Why had she contacted him? He knew for a fact that what happened between Freya and Merlin didn't exactly end on good terms, so why was she here. Why was she going to come back after everything that had happened?

"We need to tell Morgana, she has a right to know especially if they are together." Arthur said rising from his seat. The lesson wasn't finished but he didn't care. Freya was coming and this would mean a whole lot of drama was coming with her.

"No Arthur! We can't." Gwen said pulling the protective friend, fake brother or whatever the hell he was to Morgana back in the black plastic seat.

"And why not? You know as well as I do that this will get ugly. Morgana doesn't know a thing about her, about what she and Merlin had. She needs to know Gwen."

"I know." She said agreeing with her boyfriend. "But we shouldn't be the ones to tell her, Merlin should do it. Anyway it'll sound better coming from him."

"Ok. I'll talk to Merlin. But I Gwen I don't like this. Freya could do anything and if she so much as says a bad word to Morgana I will flip out. Morgana has been through enough pain in her life, she doesn't need anymore."

They both nodded in agreement. Morgana defiantly didn't need any more pain, the poor girl probably wouldn't be able to handle it. They would do whatever it took to stop Freya from doing what she came here to do, which they didn't know what that was yet but both had presumed it was something bad. Freya was bad news and from now on, it seems, that things are about to get worse.

A whole lot worse.

**So what did you think. Not the lovey dovey Arwen chapter I know but the story needs a twist. Sorry if this was dissapointing. Freya is back and by the looks of it she is trouble. But why? And How? Don't worry all will be revealed. xxx**


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

**Dun dun dun… Freya returns in this chapter. I bet your holding onto the screen yelling 'OMG what the hell?!' Well your about to find out. So this chapter starts with Merlin telling Morgana about Freya. Then the lady in question turns up. So let me know if you listened to that song or not. Anyway on with the show. Xxx**

_"Confession is not betrayal. What you say or do doesn't matter; only feelings matter. If they could make me stop loving you-that would be the real betrayal."_

Merlin was sitting in Costa waiting for Morgana to arrive. It was Saturday afternoon and Merlin had decided it was time to tell Morgana about Freya. Not because Arthur had pressured him, which he had, no he wanted to because she had every right to know. He had told her to meet him here at half past two but as usual Morgana was late. 'One is not late everyone else is simple early.' She told him every time he had commented on the matter, quoting the Princess Diaries which was her favourite film growing up. So when his watch showed the time to be 2:40 he wasn't worried.

She walked through the shop door at 2:55 and Merlin had to admit that he had started to panic because she was never normally this late, but when he saw her walk through the doors all his worry melted away. Sliding through the people waiting to be served she waved over to Merlin and kissed him gently before taking the seat opposite him.

"Sorry I'm late, huge history test coming up and I wanted to study at the library where it is actually quite and I can't hear Arthur and Gwen through my bedroom walls." She shuddered and made a grossed out expression on her face and Merlin chuckled at how even when she tried to look disgusted she still ended up being beautiful.

"Don't worry about it. Two minutes before you came I ordered you're favourite. I'd drink it if I was you before it gets cold" He smiled and signalled to the cup of hot chocolate in front of her.

"mmm" she said in satisfaction as the warm liquid travelled down her throat. "You even got them to put honey in it."

"I'm just that good." He teased and she playfully smacked his left arm. They both sat drinking the contents of their cups before Morgana broke the silence.

"Merlin, why did you ask me to come?" She questioned.

"What, do I have to have a reason for asking my girlfriend out?" he replied with a loving smile which should have made her blush but it didn't. Instead she stayed as cold as ice. Her eyes as stern as her expression.

"No Merlin you don't, but I know someone with a secret when I see one so don't try and pretend otherwise." In Morgana's defence she had seen a lot of people keeping secrets from her, her mother for one, and here was Merlin buying her her favourite drink and making it even sweeter with a bit of honey. And no this wasn't suspicious behaviour, but Morgana had a feeling and when she had a feeling she was usually right. In this case she was.

"I'm sorry. It's scary how well you can see right through me." He gave a half-hearted smile to the beautiful girl but again she didn't move.

"I've been texting someone. Someone who we all, erm Me, Gwen and Arthur know or knew." He stuttered before looking at the unchanged beauty sitting before him and continued. "Her name is Freya, she's my ex. No before you say and think anything I'm not cheating on you, she contacted me. She told me that she is back in town and is coming back to our school on Wednesday."

"So why would this bother me? She is just an ex Merlin and I know you wouldn't cheat on me. Arthur would probably castrate you if you did." She joked seeming unfazed by what Merlin had said. He on the other hand didn't.

"That's not all." He replied grimly and watched as the smile on her face became non-existent and her face turned to a frown.

"Then what is it? Because you are starting to have me worrying now." He took her hands in his and gently stoked her knuckles.

"Our relationship didn't end well. I cheated on her with her best friend and she found out and got angry and left." She quickly pulled her hands away from his.

"You cheated on her with her best friend." It wasn't a question so much as a fact and it felt like Merlin had just been punched in the guts.

"You're disgusting!" she spat at him like she was a snake spitting out venom.

"Why are you so angry Morgana, it's not as if I cheated on you." He replied with a little more anger than he would have liked. This only made her more angry and he could see it written all over her face. The tight pull on her ruby red lips, the flared glint in her eyes.

"Because Merlin. If you cheated on her than what is to stop you from cheating on me? Oh yeah that's right nothing! You know Merlin I don't like being vulnerable I try to avoid it like a plague but I didn't care about that when I was with you. All barriers seemed to break down and crumble before me as I began to love you. I like being in control Merlin, it's one of my many flaws, but I found myself lost with you, lost in you. And now when I really love you, you tell me this. You tell me that you have cheated on someone you loved. Have you heard the expression Merlin 'Once a cheat always a cheat? No. Well I'll be dammed if you hurt me like you hurt her. I won't let myself go through the pain again. So tell me Merlin what is to stop you from cheating on me?!"

With that last question hanging in the air she stormed out almost knocking out a few of the other customers in the shop. She didn't look back and she didn't have too. Merlin knew exactly how she would look. It was the same way Freya had. He understood why she was angry, it was hard for her to trust people he got that. But she could trust him, he wouldn't do anything like that to her, because unlike his relationship with Freya he actually loved Morgana. He loved her so much it hurt and he knew all he had to do was prove it. The problem was how.

* * *

They hadn't spoken since their conversation on Saturday, and she thought it was probably a good thing. She had seen him at school but when he tried to talk to her she walked away. Gwen had tried to comfort her and tell her that Merlin never loved Freya as much as he loved her but for some reason that only made it worse. Morgana was no longer vulnerable or in pain she was just hollow. All her barriers had been rebuilt with strong reinforcements, someone would have to burn them down if they wanted to take her heart. So when she walked through the school gates and into the main building she didn't stop when Merlin called her name, nor when Gwen grabbed her arm to see if she was ok. No she didn't stop at any of them. What she did stop at was the hushed whisper behind her as the lady in question was back.

Freya had arrived and by the look on her face she means business.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10 **

**Wow I have hit double figures. Thank you all for reading and liking the story. So Freya is back and you all think you know the story but you don't. She is keeping a secret that only she knows. Will she tell anyone or will she keep them in the dark? Xxx**

_"Sometimes, I wonder what mistake I made to lose you."_

Freya didn't seem at all fazed by the stares she got and the hushed whispers that followed her as she walked down the corridor. Morgana felt happy for the girl. She was confident and didn't care what people thought about her and Morgana knew there was a time when she herself was like that. A time when she wasn't as vulnerable as she is now, even with all her barriers she still had given away her heart only for it to be crushed by the man she thought she loved. She laughed at the irony. She had loved her father and he is gone. She had loved her mother but she is gone. Now she had loved Merlin but he too is gone. Everyone she loved had disappeared from her, and she sensed that Freya was like her. Hurt. Vulnerable. Alone.

Freya had gone into a room which Morgana had thought was her first class not realising it was her own also until she walked through the modern door and saw her sitting in the unoccupied seat which was once Gwen's. History used to be Morgana's favourite lesson. Her and Gwen would sit next to each other joking about their relationships, but now that Gwen had moved to sit with her other friend Sophia, Morgana just sat by herself. What didn't help the matter was that on the same day Gwen had moved seats Merlin and Arthur did too, finding a desk at the opposite side of the room from her. However now it seems that she will not be alone, Freya had joined her.

"Hey, your Freya right? I'm Morgana." She said sweetly to the other girl as she took her normal seat. Getting out her history book she couldn't help but notice that she and Freya shared some similarities. Both had dark hair but Morgana noticed that hers was shorter and slightly thinner than her own, and both were pale skinned.

"Yes that's right I'm Freya. I used to go here but certain circumstances made it difficult so I moved but now I'm back. I'm sure you have heard about me." Freya replied in a monotone voice.

"Actually I have only heard a little, and let's just say it wasn't from a very reliable source." Morgana risked a glance in Merlin's direction but as his eyes caught hers she quickly pulled away and carried on the conversation. "So why did you come back if circumstances were difficlut?"

"Learning to walk away is hard but staying to suffer is harder." She replied which only made Morgana confused.

"So you walked away from whatever had happened," not wanting the girl to know just yet how she actually knew everything that had happened, "and now you have come back to make things harder for yourself?"

"No. I came back because I need something." She stated coldly. Morgana shivered as if she had just stepped out into a blizzard. "I need revenge."

There the conversation stopped. Morgana wanted to know what she had in store for Merlin out of curiosity, she tried to fool herself. It wasn't out of curiosity it was out of love and she knew it. Even though she was angry at Merlin she still loved him, but she didn't want to break down the barriers again. But Morgana had noticed something in Freya's eyes when she said she needs revenge. Something sinister. Morgana sensed that she didn't know the full story and presumed that Merlin and the other's didn't either.

"Morgana is looking at you." Arthur said to a slumped over Merlin with his head in his hands.

"Oh yeah? Why don't you do me favour and don't tell me anything and leave me alone so I can go to sleep." Merlin responded. It was pointless being concerned or feeling anything else for Morgana as she clearly didn't feel anything for him. They hadn't spoken since the argument and every time Merlin had texted or phoned he would either get no response or was sent straight to her ever annoying voicemail. 'You've reached my voicemail…congratulations. You know what to do…beep.' Acting like he didn't care was for the best. Not that he didn't care, no he cared a lot, he loved her and no matter if she continued to ignore him that wouldn't change. Even if she hated him he would continue to love her.

"Will you stop with the pity party already you selfish prat." Arthur said in a fed up yet serious tone.

"Me? Selfish? Arthur are you blind she is the one who-" He wanted to continue he sentence wanted to say horrible things about Morgana, but he couldn't. He had moved his hands away from his face and lifted his head up. Delicious jade eyes looked upon his blue longingly and he was dumbfounded once again by her beauty.

"Yes you Merlin. Morgana isn't invisible you know. You can't just burn her and expect there to be no scars. By saying what you said and doing what you did her barriers broke down, and trust me they don't do that easily. But you Merlin, you manage to get through all of her defence mechanisms and she loved no she does love you." That's what it took for Merlin to move his gaze to Arthurs and for Morgana to turn back to Freya.

"So why doesn't she show it."

"I don't know Merlin, I'm not a girl. You should ask Gwen." He replied with a jokey tone.

"I might just do that."

Merlin needed to know. Girls were so complicated, one day they wanted one thing and the next another. Morgana was different though. Different from any girl in this room, in the school even. She is even more confusing and that makes her even more special.

**Sorry it is short again. I find if it gets too long the story drags. So it looks like Freya is hiding something and Merlin wants Morgana back and needs some girly advice. Any requests for chapters just ask. Maybe you want background on Freya. Or more Mergana and Arwen scenes, just post it and I will abide. **


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

**I had my history exam today. It went suprisingly okay. It started snowing so I got sent home after the exam which was great because I got more time to write this. Anyway I think you might like this chapter, let me know. xxx**

_"I'd learned that some things are best kept secret."_

Morgana didn't sit with them at lunch. Since Saturday tings were just too awkward and she didn't want to put Arthur and Gwen in a difficult position so she kept herself distant. Eating in the park just outside of the school, which just so happened to be the same park that she and Merlin had shared their first kiss. Sitting on the exact same bench at the exact same place in the exact same place, yet everything had changed. She knows things have changed, become more complicated and she knew that Merlin wasn't the reason. It was her. She had made their conversation into a screaming match and made the conscious effort to avoid him. She wanted to cry but she couldn't. Its seems that Morgana Le Fey doesn't cry.

"You too huh?" came the questioning voice of Freya.

_Great _Morgana thought, _exactly what I need right now._ She looked up to see her standing in front of her with a contempt look on her face. Freya let out a sigh and slumped onto the bench next to Morgana and twisted her head around the landscape.

"This place holds so many memories." Still looking over everything as if seeing if anything had changed from the last time she was here. "Special memories." Freya said smiling and looking at Morgana.

Morgana kept her head down sliding her phone through her slim pale fingers not taking any notice of the girl. _Why doesn't she just get the hint? I don't want to know her and her 'special memories'. _Freya's voice broke through her thoughts.

"This was the place Merlin and I shared our first kiss. Well that among other things." At this Morgana looked up with her mouth wide open.

This was her special place with Merlin, or so she thought. How much he had been hiding. Had he met her at Costa too when he told her he had cheated? And what 'other things' was Freya referring too. Oh god she couldn't. No. The thought of Merlin and Freya here doing that made Morgana shiver.

"Oh you didn't know? Yes we did but no it wasn't here." She smirked reading Morgana's discomfort and thoughts apparently. "I thought you're precious Merlin would have told you."

"Why would he tell me he isn't my precious anything." Morgana spat at the smug looking girl who was still sitting next to her.

Freya shook her head and starting tutting disapprovingly which only made Morgana more furious. "Oh Morgana, green is such an ugly colour on you." (well actually I think it is rather nice, but who cares back on with the story.) "Merlin told me everything," she continued smugly like a cat who had just caught its mouse, "about you and him. Your poor poor life story."

At this Morgana snapped. "You bitch!" she screamed and lunged at her pulling her thin dark hair and making her squeal in pain. "You know nothing about me!" throwing Freya to the concrete beneath them. She fell on the surface with a thud but Morgana didn't feel bad. Freya was disgusting and manipulative and deserved everything she was about to give her. She knew nothing about her. Nothing of her life. Not the lonely years she had suffered after her father's death. Not the pain and grief she had been through, watching her mother abandon her too. Alone. Afraid.

"No your wrong I do know you." Freya breathed just before Morgana was about to slap her. She struggled to raise herself. The concrete had grazed the side of her face and her head was bleeding slightly from the force of Morgana's grip. "Because I've been there."

"Don't come near me again. If you do you will get worse than this." Morgana spat and walked away from the bruised girl on the ground meaning every word she had just said.

* * *

The cafeteria was busy. Students packed in a line waiting for food whilst others sat around the red tables with a group of their friends. Merlin sat with Arthur and Gwen at a table near the back, eating his cheese sandwich. Arthur and Gwen we talking and smiling and Merlin couldn't help but feel like the third wheel.

"Where you going mate?" Arthur asked as Merlin stood from his seat and began to leave the cafeteria.

"I'd thought I'd take a walk, get some fresh air." Merlin replied. Gwen smiled sweetly at the obviously confused boy.

"She'll come back to you Merlin, she just needs time." Gwen said and Merlin nodded before leaving.

It was only a short walk to the park. Took all about ten minutes. In those ten minutes Merlin's thoughts were filled of only one person. Her piercing yet beautiful jade eyes. Her delicious lips that tasted like sugar. Her long raven coloured hair that always smelt like cherries. Her pale skin that was almost as soft as silk. How he longed for her to be with him again, to laugh with him again. She was so angry, so distant.

He felt the trees brush against him as he walked through the park and towards the rusty bench. Morgana wasn't at lunch but she hadn't been there all week and all Merlin wanted was to talk to her and explain everything properly and how he could and would never cheat on her because he loved her so much it hurt. Maybe she was sitting on the bench. No why would she be sitting on the bench when it held memories. Pushing these thoughts out of his head he continued walking until he say her. Sitting on the bench with a grazed face and slightly bloody head.

"Freya? What Happened?" The girl looked up and smiled weakly at Merlin who ran quickly towards her.

Freya began to sob and Merlin instinctively comforted her.

"It was Morgana." She chocked through sobs. "She attacked me."

"Shhhh. It's okay." Merlin said wiping away tears and pulling her into an embrace. Her head rested on his shoulder, and Merlin noticed that she had stopped crying. What he didn't notice was the smirk that rested upon her lips. The evil glint in her eyes.

**DUN DUN DUN... so what did you all think. Morgana got fiesty and gave Freya a much deserved beat up. Merlin don't believe whatever she says she is evil! What's going to happen? **


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

**Before you start reading this chapter I just want to ask if you all like the twist I have put on Freya making her a bitch and whatnot. Anyway this chapter contains slight offensive language and moderate scenes of violence. Enjoy! **

_"Just because something isn't a lie does not mean that it isn't deceptive. A liar knows that he is a liar, but one who speaks mere portions of truth in order to deceive is a craftsman of destruction."_

Merlin helped Freya walk into the school grounds letting her lean on him if she needed it. Morgana had thrown Freya on the ground with such force that the right side of her ribs were now a deep blue colour and very painful. As they passed through the gates and edged nearer to main building Freya stopped.

"What is it?" Merlin asked softly stopping next to her.

"Merlin can you not leave me today. I know we have our past but I don't really feel safe knowing she is in there." Freya had plastered on a fake fear look and it was almost scary at how manipulative she could actually be.

"Of course I won't leave you. I just, I just can't believe Morgana did that to you. It doesn't seem like her." He replied lost in thought.

"Well Merlin you obviously don't know Morgana at all because she did it. Every single thing."

Freya had spun the truth well and managed to twist what happened to her advantage. It wasn't her fault that Merlin had found her on the bench straight after Morgana had pulled her hair and thrown her to the floor, but she had to admit this was part of her plan which she didn't see coming. Making Merlin believe her and not Morgana was an opportunity she wasn't going to miss. Merlin would pay for what he had done to her and now it seems that Morgana would to.

They stepped into the main building and immediately Freya had caught sight of Morgana. She was putting away some textbooks in her locker and wasn't looking there direction. Taking full advantage Freya pulled out the 'act like a scared girl' card and poked Merlin in his side.

"There she is." She stuttered trying to seem frightened which was apparently working. "Merlin I don't think I can do this. I want to go home." Then she made her eyes well up with tears and Merlin suddenly became protective.

"You're not going anywhere. Come on." He forcefully grabbed Freya's wrist and headed straight in the direction of Morgana.

* * *

Putting away her English Literature textbook Morgana's mind was elsewhere. First of all how did that cow know anything about her and her life and second why would Merlin feel the need to tell this all to a girl he cheated on if she meant nothing to him and he loved her. The corridor was busy with people all heading to their own lockers to get whatever they needed for the last two lessons of the day. It wasn't particularly noisy but Morgana felt the conversations around her diminish and finally all was silent. Curious as to why it had fallen silent all of a sudden Morgana looked up. Standing behind her was two people she really didn't want to see and one of them she wanted to punch in the face.

"So Freya told me you did this to her." Merlin said boldly pointing to the grazed side of Freya's head as if he was about to scold a child. He was right she had done this to Freya but Morgana wondered why he was so mad. It's not like the bitch didn't ask for it. Unless she didn't tell him the whole truth.

Deciding to play this little game Morgana turned back around and faced her open locker. "So what if I did?" She heard Freya choke back a sob behind her and felt Merlin stiffen. Oh Freya is good Morgana would give her that.

"Don't try and play games Morgana." Merlin said a little too protectively for Morgana's liking.

"Are you blind as well as stupid? I'm not the one playing the game here she is." Pointing at Freya with a furious frown on her face.

Freya had stopped with the pretend sobs and faked curiosity next. "I don't know what you're talking about Morgana. Look I'm sorry if I offended you but I don't think I deserved this." Suggesting to the somewhat large graze on her face.

"You manipulative bitch!" Morgana slammed the door of her locker without even looking at it and kept her eyes on Freya daring her to say something more.

"Morgana don't you think you have done enough?" Merlin asked wanting to diffuse the situation from getting any worse even though he was the one to start it in the first place.

"Clearly I haven't done enough." She snarled.

Freya was now ready take up the challenge. She pushed Merlin aside and stepped closer to Morgana, who if looks could kill Freya would have already been dead by now. "I really don't know what your problem is. Obviously Merlin's taste has diminished somewhat since he was with me to take up a depressing hoe like you."

"You're my problem." Morgana snarled again, her rage creeping higher and higher.

Without warning Freya grabbed clump of Morgana's thick raven hair and yanked in down with mighty force. Morgana let out a yelp and stamped on Freya's left foot, which was incredibly painful as Morgana was wearing black Dr Martens. Freya loosed Morgana's hair and gave her a wild look. She lunged at her grabbing her waist and slamming her against the row of lockers behind her. Morgana let out a cry of pain as the hinges on the smalls doors scrapped against her back. Morgana started thrashing trying to break free from Freya's tight grip. Everyone was staring at the bitch fight that was going on and hade made a circle around them.

"You stupid bi-" Freya started to spit but Morgana head-butted the girl in the face sending her stumbling backwards to recover. The impact had made Morgana slightly dizzy but the adrenaline quickly took over and dulled the pain and she slapped Freya hard in the face smirking as she saw the red mark appear immediately. The gathered crowd simultaneously released a gasp as Freya retaliated by punching Morgana in the nose. Blood started to pour down her face. Scarlet red staining her ivory skin. Morgana's vision went blurred as little black dots started to appear at the corners of her eyes. The last thing she saw before she passed out was Arthur holding back a thrashing Freya and Merlin was nowhere to be seen.

**So what have we learnt? One never ever go up against Morgana she will make you regret it. Two Freya is a manipulative bitch. And three Freya can give one hell of a punch. **


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

**I'm truly honoured for all the positive feedback thank you it means so much to me. 'Iricious' thank you for all your kind words over the course of this story, your last one made me smile and I agree it's about time Merlin finds out the truth.**

_"Power is of two kinds. One is obtained by the fear of punishment and the other by acts of love. Power based on love is a thousand times more effective and permanent than the one derived from fear of punishment."_

"Morgana? Morgana can you hear me?"

A soft voice broke through the haze. She fluttered open her eyes but couldn't see, her vision was blurred. A blinding pain covered her lower face and Morgana tentatively brought up her left hand to inspect where it was coming from. Her slender fingers brushed over her face and skimmed over her nose. A groan left her lips as another shooting pain pounded in her head.

"What happened?" she croaked still unable to see whoever was talking to her.

"Freya happened." The voice was stronger more dominant that before. Morgana rubbed her eyes to regain her vision.

Next to her sat Arthur and Morgana couldn't deny the fact that she was slightly disappointed that it wasn't Merlin. The last thing Morgana could remember was seeing Arthur holding back a thrashing Freya and Merlin was nowhere to be seen.

"Speaking of that bitch where is she?" Morgana croaked again and Arthur handed a glass of water. She took a gulp waiting for Arthur to tell her.

"Well I'll start from the beginning. Me and Gwen had left the cafeteria and saw a massive circle of people and heard someone yelp. So we walked over and pushed our way through and saw Freya pining you up against the locker. Then you dealt an impressive head-butt and slapped her which was awesome. Her fist went up so quick I couldn't stop her Morgana, she punched you in the nose and you passed out. Seeing the blood pour from your nose was too much. Merlin had disappeared like the stupid prat he is so I grabbed Freya and held her back before she could do any more damage." Arthur said without taking a single breath. His face was flushed and Morgana could see the anger in his eyes and didn't know if she was the cause of it or not. "Anyway Freya has been suspended for a week but not before screaming 'I was Pregnant Merlin!' down the corridor as she was hauled down by a couple of teachers, and you were brought to the nurse's 'medical room'."

Morgana's face dropped. Freya was pregnant when Merlin had cheated on her with her best friend. She felt sick. Did Freya have the baby or did she abort it? She must have felt so alone and scarred. What did her parents say? Merlin obviously didn't know that cow is an impressive manipulator. Did she truly know all about Morgana's past?

"By the look on your face you are thinking the same thing I was." Arthur replied softly this time.

"Where's Merlin?" She asked quickly. "Does he know? Did he know? No of course he didn't know or she wouldn't have screamed it down the hall."

"I don't know where he is. Morgana what happened."

She started from the very beginning. With the argument on Saturday and what she had said not leaving out a single word. She told him what had happened in the park with Freya and how she said she knew about her past and she just lost it. Finally she told him about the fight and how all of that came to pass.

"Gosh Morgana. Do you think she really knew about your past?" Arthur quizzed with a sympathetic look.

"I thought she did, that's why I lashed out, but now I'm not so sure. After what you have told me about her being pregnant I think she just made it up so I would retaliate and she could get close to Merlin to tell him that."

Arthur pondered this for a moment. "But even if she did make it up she must have known that your life was bad or else she wouldn't get the retaliation she wanted from you."

"Maybe she just heard people talking. You know about those hushed whispers." Morgana thought this was how she had heard. Merlin would never have told anyone about what she had been through. About how lonely she was and the nightmares that she has.

"Anyway I have to go Mrs Pritchard will kill me if I'm late." Arthur got up and placed a sweet brotherly kiss on Morgana's head and left the room.

Merlin wouldn't come in she knew that. She closed her eyes and drifted in and out of sleep until the land of dreams took her hostage.

* * *

Gwen decided to skip biology today, she wasn't in the mood for learning about leaves she was more focused on her friend. After seeing Freya hit her in that nose and blood come pouring out she wanted to make sure she was alright. She reached the door leading to the medical room and knocked quietly on the door. There was no response so Gwen stepped in sliently and sat in the cahir next to a sleeping Morgana.

Morgana looked so peacful in sleep. Gwen knew that nightmares plauged her but right now she looked so calm. Her nose was a little red though and the remains of dried blood stuck to her pale skin just above her top lip. She couldn't see her back but she guessed that it had some scratches on it. Gwen got flannel that was resting next to the sink and poured some warm water on it. Gently she dabbed the wet flannel over the area of her face which dried blood clung to, careful not to hurt her. After a while the blood had washed away Gwen decided to wake Morgana up.

"Morgana." she whispered and shook her shoulders gently.

Morgana groaned but opened her eyes. Her face broke out into a small smile as it was too painful for her to smile normally. "Gwen."

Gwen smiled back at her friend. They hadn't spoken in a while but they were still close and that wouldn't change. "So it took a punch to the face to get you to talk to me again." Gwen said jokingly to the girl.

"Oh Gwen, please shut up." she replied back wanting to smile but couldn't. "I heard Freya got suspended."

"Yes she did but she is back in a week. Morgana I have a plan." Gwen had a mischievous look on her face which Morgana thought didn't suit her.

"A plan for what?"

"A plan to get Freya back for what she did to you." Gwen said cunningly. She had already formulated this plan in her head and to her it sounded good. She would pretend to be with Merlin which would make Freya jealous and the bitch would get expelled or something.

"Gwen that is sweet that you thought about me," Morgana started sarcasticly "but it really isn't necessary. Freya is suspended, people have seen her true colours so the game is over."

"By people you mean Merlin." Gwen retorted with a cheeky smile.

"Yes Gwen I mean Merlin. That bitch had him wrapped round her finger. I can't believe that he bleieved her and not me." Morgana's features turned angry. Her jade eyes were squinted.

"Morgana, do you honestly believe that?"

"Yes I do. You should have seen the way he looked at me when he was defending Freya."

"Morgana you are acting ridiculous." Gwen was getting angry now. How could her best friend be so blind. Merlin loved her but she was too scared to admit that she loved him back. She had driven him away with her cold heart and her inability to love.

"I'm acting ridiculous!" Morgana voice was raised but Gwen was not afraid. She knew that Morgana knew she spoke the truth.

"Yes! Why can't you just accept the fact you love him?" Gwen had never shouted at someone like she was shouting at Morgana now.

"I have accepted it." Morgana's voice was quieter now. All the anger in her had deflated.

"Then why don't you show it?" Gwen was calm again and looked tenderly at her friend.

"I can't. I can't be vulnerable again Gwen. I need control. On my own I have control. In a realtionship I have none." Morgana wasn't sad. Her eyes wern't filled with tears. She was just hollow.

Gwen didn't wan't to push the matter any further. She understood how her friend was feeling, well she understood as much as she could.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

**I have a feeling that this story has nearly run its course. Hopefully I can end it on a high. So last chapter saw Gwen standing up to Morgana a little bit. Where was Merlin? Don't worry this chapter is all from form Merlin's P.O.V enjoy!**

_"Expose yourself to your deepest fear; after that, fear has no power, and the fear of freedom shrinks and vanishes. You are free."_

He didn't want to walk away. He wanted to do something, anything to make them stop, but his feet wouldn't move. Stuck. Rooted to the ground. Only when Morgana was on the floor blood pouring out of her nose did he react. The sight of her made him ache. He knew he wasn't the direct cause of this problem, that went to Freya, but he had succumb to Freya's manipulation and hated himself because of it.

He had to move. Had to get away. Far away so that no one could see the tears in his eyes. So he could cry in peace and away from prying eyes. Staggering backwards through the group of people he saw Freya being held back by Arthur and Gwen immediately at Morgana's side. He should be there. He should be the one holding her in his arms, protecting her. He should have been the one holding Freya back. He should have been there but he couldn't.

A distant voice called out "I was pregnant Merlin." and that stopped him dead in his tracks. Freya had done many things said many things but this was just too much. How far was she going to go? How far would she take this game? It was a lie. Freya was never pregnant. They had never slept together and as far as Merlin knew he was a virgin, saving himself for the one he knew to be his. It wasn't enough that she had manipulated him into believing her over Morgana, which was something he thought he would never do.

It wasn't even enough that she had just punched Morgana out cold. His Morgana. The one he loved. No she wanted to make a lasting impression. To make everyone gossip about what she had said, to make Morgana doubt him even more that she already does. Freya makes him sick and the thought that he once had feelings for her makes him want to smash his face against a wall. He couldn't possibly love anyone as much as he loves Morgana, and the fact that she stood up to Freya like she did only made him love her more.

She feels the same right? Or else why would she have retaliated. Why would she get so angry with Freya is she didn't at least feel something for him.

He had found an empty room filled with stationary equipment and decided he would stay here for a while. Exclude himself from everyone else and be at peace with his thoughts for a while. He sat with his back against the wooden door and brought his knees to his chest and head in his hands. He sat there for what seemed like an eternity and all that time a certain lady plagued his thoughts. Memories of them together were flooding his mind.

When he first saw her.

_… It wasn't just her breath taking beauty that made him notice, nor the way she sat facing him. It was the way her eyes looked into his. Her stunning jade eyes connecting with his blue as if she could see right through him and into his soul. He didn't dare move until he was sure she wasn't a figment of his imagination, a day dream he mistook to be real…_

The first time they spoke.

_…"Merlin, I want to introduce you to Morgana Le Fey she is new." Gwen said with a slight giggle in her voice and both Merlin and Morgana faced her. _

_"Oh hi, I, I'm Merlin" he stammered as she turned and he saw just how beautiful she actually was. Her skin was like the colour of ivory which contrasted with the harshness of her raven hair that fell just below her chest. Her face was like it had been sculpted by angels and her lips, oh, how he longed for her lips. The colour of blood red resting on the sumptuous skin. His hands began to sweat again and he had to calm himself down. He gulped and took in a little air, hoping she didn't notice. _

_"Hi like Gwen said my name is Morgana." She said sweetly and smiled at him and he returned her smile…_

The first time they kissed.

_…"I, I can't cope Merlin. Five years and you'd think it would get better, that pain and grief would settle down and I'd be able to be normal, but they don't. They keep eating and eating away at me until I scream or cry. But the problem is I can't do that. I can't scream. I can't cry. I just feel numb. You know? Like you could stab me and I wouldn't feel it. You know Merlin, I used to think good things happened to good people, that the universe rewarded us for every good dead we had done, for every life we have saved, but if that is so then my dad must have been a bad person. He must have done awful things to deserve to die," he could hear the anger rising in her voice the mixed feelings of pain, grief and anger all fused into one but as soon as he heard that it changed. It became weak again. "What if my dad wasn't a bad person, what if I am? What if I'm the reason he's dead? The reason that everything, every person I get close to disappears. Maybe this is a karmic pay back, the universes way of telling me I suck. That I will never have a family and never be close to someone. Never be loved." She sobbed as all of her emotions came spilling out of her like running water from a tap. _

_He felt his heart break as each tear ran down her cheeks. As every breath she took sounded heavier than the last. She wasn't a bad person. None of this was her fault. The universe wasn't giving her a karmic pay back. She was perfect in every single way and he needed to let her know. _

_"I love you." He said slowly caressing her face with his right hand while tilting her head up to face him with the other. "None of this is your fault. You're not a bad person you have so much good in you. You're perfect."_

_He lent into her face feeling her breath mingling with his. Warm and sweet. Then their lips met…_

He stood up abruptly after that last memory almost banging his head on the shelf above him. Opening the door he started to walk briskly towards the medical which he knew Morgana would be in. He had to see her. Had to tell her everything he felt. He had to kiss her again, be with her again.

For all the confusion she brought him and the complexity and anger between them. He knew that she was the only one he could ever be with. The only one he saw a future with.

This future is as clear as cut glass.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

**I hope this chapter will be to your liking. I have to share something with you all…I'm failing French…****_GREAT_****…is anyone good at French and can help me let me know. ;) Anyway we all knew Freya was a bitch but to go that far, damn she is psycho. So this chapter is all Mergana. I know I'm so good to you. Reviews are welcomed.**

_"Love is everything it's cracked up to be…It really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everything for…and the problem is, if you don't risk everything, you risk even more."_

She wasn't asleep. Not anymore. After Gwen left she couldn't sleep. Her mind was racing about Merlin, how she had pushed him away. She loves him so much but that scares her. She craves control like a pregnant woman craves chocolate, it's her comfort, her strength. Vulnerability is her weakness. So she wasn't asleep, instead she was sitting up on the little bed in the medical room. The nurse hadn't been back since she had left one hour ago, saying she was going to phone Uther and tell him what had happened. Uther wouldn't leave work Morgana knew that. His work was everything to him and she was nothing compared to his business, compared to his beloved son Arthur.

A soft knock drew her attention. Probably the nurse confirming that Uther wouldn't come because he was _busy_.

"Come in." Morgana said loudly enough for her to hear.

The door opened slowly to reveal the owner of the knock. To Morgana's surprise it wasn't the old nurse it was Merlin. His eyes looked slightly puffy and his hair was ragged. He had been crying.

"Merlin, what is it? What's wrong?" Morgana didn't like seeing him like this, broken, and it hurt her to think she was the cause of it.

Merlin didn't answer her, instead he walked briskly towards the beauty and sat on the edge of the bed not facing her. Why was he so cold? Why did he not look at her? Morgana raised her right arm and placed her slender hand on his shoulder giving him enough time to pull away from her touch if he wanted. He didn't. He welcomed her touch, it sent sparks of electricity through his veins. Even though her hand was not directly on his skin the electricity of her touch was great. She could feel it too.

"I'm so sorry." He said bowing his head in shame.

"Hey, look at me." She said sweetly but sternly. When he didn't comply she took his jaw in her left hand and pushed it so he was facing her. He eyes still didn't meet hers and she began to feel frustrated. "Damn it Merlin look at me." Her tone startled him a little she could see by his expression. His eyes rose slowly until they meet. Cold jade on glistening sapphire.

"You have nothing to be sorry for, you've done nothing wrong. I should apologise. I have been so cold, so hard but believe me Merlin when I say it wasn't because I didn't love you because I do. I am so completely and utterly in love with you that it scares me to death." Her eyes softened as she spoke and Merlin too stunned by this knew declaration of affection just listened. "It scares me because with you I'm not in control. I'm no good at giving my control to someone else. I'm scared of being vulnerable."

Morgana jerked her hand away from his face where it had been resting the entire time she spoke. Merlin just sat still, frozen, eyes still glued on hers. "Well say something."

"I-I don't know what to say." At this Morgana's eyes started to fill with tears. She quickly averted her gaze and began tugged at the hem of her shirt. "I don't know what to say because you have said it all."

She still didn't look up keeping her hands busy with the hem of her shirt and her eyes trained of the rough fabric. He cupped her face and brought it up so there eyes met once more.

"You have said everything I was about to say to you. But you left out one thing." He said with a slight smirk on his face.

"Oh and what's that?" she replied his smirk and on her it look slightly more devilish.

"The part where I do this." He said his voice barley audible.

Their lips met. His rough against her soft. The taste of spice against sweet. The kiss was electrifying sending pulses through their blood, intensifying their passion. Neither wanted the kiss to end but they knew it had to. Morgana pulled away first, much to Merlin's disappointment.

"That has to be one of the cheesiest lines you have ever said to me." She said with a slight giggle.

"I can think of more, but why should we be talking?" bearing his most goofy grin just for her.

"That's you Merlin ever the optimist." Laughing as their lips met again.

She wasn't in control, but she didn't care. She was vulnerable again but she didn't care. They say even in that darkest nights, in your darkest dreams and your darkest fears only one thing can break you free. Only one thing can you bring you light. One thing that can bring you peace. Can bring you hope. That thing is simple.

That thing is love.

**The story is coming to a close I have a feeling the next chapter will be its last. I hope I haven't disappointed anyone. The chapter is short but sometimes short is needed. Morgana and Merlin are finally together again. Please review ;D **


	16. Chapter 16

**Epilogue**

_'There are moments in your life that make you and sets the course of who you're going to be. Sometimes they're little, subtle moments. Sometimes, they're big moments you never saw coming. No one asks for their life to change, but it does. It's what you do afterwards that counts. That's when you find out who you are.'_

_These moments come as a surprise. They come when you least expect them to. When you have given up all hope something shines through. Makes you see sense. What you have been missing out on. Yes sometimes they are big moments. Yes sometimes they are your fault. Maybe it isn't what you wanted but it is what you have got. It's what you've been given. If you let these moments change you, they win and you lose. They shape you and you don't change. Open your heart to new things. Don't be afraid of being vulnerable. Don't be afraid of being alone because no one, no matter who they are and what they have been through is truly alone. Some things happen for a reason. Some things are destined to be. So when their eyes set upon each other they knew. They knew that this was the moment which changed everything. _

_Some things happen for a reason. Some things are destined to be._

_Merlin and Morgana are one of those things. They are destined to be. _

* * *

**Just a little note from me, the author Fenrir1329. I felt as though the last chapter kind of concluded the story. I'll let you all ponder what happened after that. If you disagree with me and think I should have expanded more that is fine. I accept your opinion. I just feel as though it ended for me at that moment. The moment when they found each other again. So I wanted to write this little epilogue to finalise everything. I wanted to reuse the quote from the first chapter to both start and finish the story. **

**I want to thank all who have read this story. To all who have commented on it. This was my first piece of work for the show. It has been a privilege to take you on this journey. **

**With love, Fenrir1329 xxx**


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